Dark Journey
by Believe24
Summary: In the Void (night) Voyager faces a great crisis, her crew is falling apart and yet it's first officer seems distracted. An old and great love haunts Chakotay as a new on with Kathryn emerges. J/C au
1. Dark

JOURNEY ON

**i do not own voyage or its characters!**

* * *

Dark Journey

In the dark solitude of her quarters Janeway looked into the barren skies of which Voyager had sailed through for five months now. She didn't bother putting on her uniform or put up her hair, for in the darkness no one would see her. She desperately missed the stars which usually guided her way. Seven told her that they were unnecessary now that astrometric was functioning. She didn't understand what the rest of the crew was faced with. The crew was going stir crazy, there was nothing to do but look at sensor sweeps, go to the holodeck and read. But books couldn't help them escape from their reality. Their imaginations were being run ragged and everyone missed the stars. Kathryn couldn't believe her decision to hep a species she knew nothing about at the convenience of her crew, again! First by destroying the caretaker, stranding them in the delta quadrant and now by destroying their only way of escaping a dark starless hell brought on my theta radiation.

The plan had almost worked but two freighters had blocked their entrance to the vertex at the last second, they attempted to destroy them and then destroy the vertex as they were leaving it, but at the last second the freighter fired its own torpedo at the vertex knowing its impending doom, and destroyed it. If she had just left the quarrel between the two species she would be three years closer to home. Now she was alone in her quarters, going on and on to herself about how she doomed the crew to mild insanity. Another voice would start saying that she had done the right thing by helping the dying void species, but then the thought of her sad crew would over take her. She couldn't face them after what she had done to them.

She was reading Shakespeare's twelfth night for the fourteenth time when the chime signaled someone at the door. Kathryn groaned turning towards a corner before allowing the person who was invading her privacy to come in. The doors opened but she did not turn to them, she would wait for them to speak.

"Captain, are you busy?" They said. Kathryn sigh, it was chakotay. She turned to him,

"Not entirely, I can make the time for you. What do you want?"

"Just to give you a status report. Ah that's right, nothing new nothing to report." He said a bit sarcastically.

Kathryn groaned,"is that all?"

"No captain." He said rather uncomfortably," it's just that, well the crew misses you Kathryn. I know we've had this conversation a hundred times, but the crew is more comfortable when they see you." He now lightened his voice,"And besides, I'm getting a little tired of being in charge of the captain's chair. You were always so much better at it."

Poor Chakotay, Kathryn thought. She had forced him to take command of voyager in her absence. Even he showed signs off acute didn't want to admit it but she deeply missed the company of the crew, especially Chakotay. There was no one on the ship she felt more close to. But there was nothing really to say to him. She didn't feel like talking to him that day, nor any day.

"Thanks for the concern, but I'm sure the crew can fare without me. I'm sorry Chakotay, but I'm not going to leave anytime soon."

Chakotay looked at his captain with great disbelief. He turned to the door about to angrily storm out but turned to look at Kathryn.

"A lot of people count on you captain, whether or not you're needed on the bridge you're needed by your crew! Next time I visit you you're coming out of here whether you like it or not."

Janeway shook her head with great anger but let Chakotay leave without saying another word. She was left in the darkness once more to be alone with her thoughts, alone with her mistakes.

* * *

Chakotay stormed out of Kathryn's quarters making his way down the corridor to the mess hall. He couldn't believe that Kathryn could be so stubborn or sad. She was always such a high spirited, confident individual that he could always count on. She was the person who gave him the confidence to go on with this crazy adventure they were forced into. He missed talking to her, he missed their dinners and time on the bridge together. It felt empty without her, he and the entire crew felt the same.

The turbo lift doors opened with tuvok inside. They looked at each other for a few seconds before he entered the turbo lift with him. Chakotay mumbled a bit under his breath which Tuvok noticed immediotly. He raised his eyebrow.

"Is the captain being difficult again?"he asked

He sighed rubbing his face and hair and closed his eyes. He was exhausted from the constant night,"Yes, she refuses to leave her quarters or even talk to anyone else but me, the doctor and possibly you. She's just.."

"She is in distress commander and frankly I cannot blame her. She thinks she is solely responsible for our current predicament."

"But it wasn't her fault! Her plan was sound, something we couldn't have predicted occured and because of it she once again locks herself in her quarters! We got her out before but I just can't get her out again. Maybe you could talk to her tuvok." The turbo lift doors opened just outside the mess hall. Tuvok exited the lift and turned to the commander

"I will consider it, however my presence may not be met without conflict." He said and went the opposite direction. Chakotay did a small smirk and walk around the corner to the mess hall.

There was over three dozen people in the mess hall that afternoon, though it felt like midnight. People seemed angry and hostile towards each other. Neelix even seemed to have a bug in his pants. People seemed nervous though there was nothing to be nervous about. Everyone looked at Chakotay as he entered,it usually didn't bother him but today and for the last several days it made him uncomfortable. Everyone was expecting him to do something or tell them what to do. Was that what,it was ways like for the captain? He didn't like being so distant from the crew. He was used to being the person they would come to for help or to even just talk to. He liked to think of himself as an approachable person.

The crew kept its distance from him as he sat on one of the couches by the main entrances signaling neelix for for herbal tea. Chakotay pulled out a padd and began to read a crew report. Always the same, no changes in actions but low crew morale. He saw in the corner of his eye the doors slide open, B'Elanna came in moving her head as she glanced around the room.

"B'Elanna! Please, sit with me." Chakotay said turning his head seemed a bit annoyed but joined the commander. They hadn't talked in a few days, and he was still her closest friend besides Tom.

"What's on your mind?" She asked.

"Too much, the captain mainly. You? Anything Interesting going on in engineering? Are you and Tom still fighting?" He quickly paused realizing it may not be appropriate to ask B'Elanna about her personal life.

"Well. Tom is actually the person who keeps me sane. Without him I'd probably be bored to tears." Suddenly the ship jolted profusely. Everyone in the mess hall stood bracing themselves against tables and chairs. It felt like they were hit by something, or someone.

"Report!" Chakotay yelled tapping his comm badge.

"It appears that a Malon vessel has just come into weapons range. Apparently the ones that were destroyed were not the only ones in this part of space." Said Tuvok from the bridge."Everyone report to battle stations."

* * *

Chakotay came out of the turbo lift just as another weapon was fired at the hull. He made his way to the captain's chair .

"This Malon vessel is of different grade than the ones we saw before. This one is battle ready, with twice as much weapon power." Tuvok told him.

The Malon ship was indeed different from the others they had encountered. It had four faser banks, quantum torpedoes and was near twice as big as voyager. It hit the hull with its fasers. Deck two and three started sending in casualty reports. Another hit and a plasma conduit on the bridge exploded over the science station. Tuvok returned fire to the weapons center of the other ship and continued to try to hail them with no effect. He fired on the front section of the ship, only minor damage.

"Can we out run them?" Chakotay shouted.

"Possibly. But currently we can only go to wrap 6."

"Do it! And fire a torpedo or two as we leave."

Tuvok launched the torpedoes and immediately after Tom engaged the engines. No pursuit. The damage was minor, only a few plasma conduits were damaged and the port nassel had been grazed by phasers. It would take three days max to fix the damage. The crew seemed even a bit disappointed that there was so little to do. Chakotay didn't like the idea of a more powerful ship in theta cloud, but he started to think about the bordom. The idea of constant attack seemed more appealing. The crew seemed to have the same idea, everyone seemed more upbeat in Chakotay's eyes. They finally had some excitement, the first in months. He walked down the hall, he could see smiles on the ensign's faces. Everyone was happier from what he could see.

The test was to see if Kathryn was happier. He deeply hoped because voyager needed her captain. He pressed the chime and waited for a response. He waited a few seconds but the door did not open. She said he was always welcome in her quarters if he needed her, so why was she not responding? He had heard from her just after the attack so he knew she was ok. He waited. He waited a minute, nothing. He rang it again, and waited again. The waiting made him realise how much he missed her on the bridge, her smile, her since of leadership. He wasn't half the captain she was.

He waited and finally she opened the door. She was on her couch drinking something and reading. She signaled him in and Chakotay stepped forward. Her hair was done this time but she still wore civilian clothes. She looked at Chakotay with great discontent.

"Kathryn?"

"I heard a malon vessel attacked, hell I felt it! Is the crew alright?" She asked tentatively.

Chakotay looked at her, she was so disconnected, had she gone mad he thought. But as she stood he saw that she was still the same graceful captain and the way she spoke was just as she always did. She was maybe detached, but not insane. "The crew is fine, just some bumps and scrapes. The ship took minor damage. You should see the crew captain, they have a spark I haven't seen in a misses you."

Kathryn glanced at her first officer, his hair seemed a bit greater from stress android eyes looked weary. She hadn't been fair to him, making him take command of the ship during this time while she hid in her quarters. She didn't have to face the crew or face the situation she had gotten them in. They had been there for five months but there was another two,years to get through. Spending it tucked away,in,her quarters did seem a bit crazy which is what Chakotay thought she was, she could see it in his weary eyes.

"I'm sorry Chakotay, I having been fair to you. I never should have expected you to take command of Voyager while I stay here. I have a duty to this crew." She walked towards him as she said this, her voice soft so she wouldn't sound so insincere. She looked into his grey eyes now looking hopeful.

"Ill deeply consider it." She said simply. Chakotay gave her a small smile. She walked him to the door.

"Thank you captain." He stepped towards her and leaned in to kiss her face, it seemed like the thing to do. But Kathryn moved his lips on top of here and he could not stop himself from continuing. It lasted only a few seconds before withdrawing. He gave a rather puzzled look. Not just to Kathryn but to himself. She had kissed him and he kissed back. But why did he enjoy it so much, and why did she do it?

Chakotay gave her a last look and then exited her quarters. His heart kept beating loudly and his brain was full of questions, but the only one he could get out of his mouth was,

"What the hell?!"


	2. open

CHAP 2

'First officers personal log: Its been nearly two weeks since we realized we were not the only alien ship in the void. There are more Marlon ships than we thought. A lot of things are different than what I expected. Captain Janeway has remained in her quarters but I think she is at least trying to make an effort. Her behavior is strange, but the doctor has found nothing wrong with her. I think she just has too much on her mind.'

For the past few days Chakotay had been in a daze. The crew once again had nothing to do. At least now there was something to scan for. He had seen Kathryn once since the situation that had occurred. Neither mentioned it but it interfered with his work. He was trying to make sense of her actions, and why he almost felt pleasure with it. He was having dinner with her that evening as they usually did on was mid morning, Chakotay was on the bridge. Everyone was staying into the radiated space looking for a star that Tom Paris swore he saw. They were staring for ten minutes.

"It's around here somewhere" Tom said squinting holding back a small laugh. He had thought he'd seen something but had given up minutes ago. He just wanted to see how they would keep it up. He was dying for a good laugh.

"I really don't think that there is anything out there, even if there is it's probably just a void alien ship." Chakotay said but still not giving up on the light. Tom started laughing and Chakotay stopped looking. He slumped in his chair thinking of something to do. It had been almost an hour since he clued engineering, that would pass the time; but the last time he did B'Elanna threatened to choke the spirit out of him. He stood up.

"Alright, I'm done with this. Ill be in the..." Chakotay was cut short when the ship was hit, and hit hard. Chakotay was thrown to the floor as the ship was rocked to the left. The ship immediately went to red alert. The bridge darkened and red lights flashed from the bulkheads. You could here something coming towards them from inside the ship. They stabilized for a short moment, and they listened to the noises outside. There were little tapping noises on the hull. Tom turned to Chakotay and they had the same expression for they knew exactly what it was. Chakotay sent a message to the entire crew,

"Brace for impact! Meteor storm!" He turned to tuvok." How are they going through our shields?"

"Unknown, but it may be due to the constant thefts radiation in this particular area of the void. These may have been in it for a long time and eventually effected. Perhaps.." Tuvok was cut short as another ten ton rock hit against the hull. The crew was jerked to the left again. Now hundreds of rocks came hurling towards Voyager, sending her in all general directions. The hull began to buckle. Tuvok still at his station trying to stay standing, began trying to reconfigure the shields. Plasma conduits started overheating, the computer would not respond to verbal commands, and more rocks were damaging voyager. Casualty reports were coming in from all decks, deck four even reported a hull breach. Things were falling from ceilings, panels were overloading and sparking. The rocks were causing major damage.

"Activating newly configured shields!" The sound continued outside the ship but the ship wasn't being hit anymore. Chakotay and the rest of the crew who were on there knees stood up and waited. There was no sign of shield collapse, so they stood down red alert. The casualties came in with 31 injured including Harry and young Naomi. Main systems reported three hull breaches but no fatalities, the force fields had been activated a second before it could do any damage. Some of the outer plating was scraped off my some rocks that had grazed it before the new shields had been activated. The nassels had once again been damaged and were now even more damaged because of its earlier injury; that was the most critical damage, besides all of the hurt crew members. The repairs would take almost five days, five days on just impulse power! The warp core was undamaged but with the nassels not being able to function properly there was no use for it. Not many interior functions were damaged, but the amount outside could have been catastrophic.

"Mister Tuvok," Chakotay said gathering himself,"why didn't our censors detect that meteor storm?"

"I believe for the same reason we cannot detect the void species ships. Shall i tell the captain of our current issues?"

"No!"Cakotay said hastily."No i'll tell her about it, if she hasen't figured it out already herself." There was nothing left to be said. They started repairs starting with the engineering station on the bridge. The comm system was online but the quality was rather bad, there were small hull breaches all over the ship and they still had no idea how the meteors averted the censers. It was a mystery of how the rocks caused so much interior damage to Voyager, all of the engineers and scientists were spending all their time trying to unravel the strange phenomenon.

The crew worked for hours focusing mainly on the nassels and external censors. They were moving on impulse power alone. It made their stay in the void even less enjoyable, for now not only did it not look like they were moving, they actually weren't. At least not anywhere fast. People's previous wishes for a distraction, or an alien attack were becoming a reality and l people wanted was to have it go back to the boring simple times when they were moving and there was no chance of a plasma conduit exploding in your face. Chakotay and Kim worked on the engineering consuls, Wildman searched for any anomalies on the censors, and Tuvok was preparing a report documenting the ships structural status. Three hours and there was no progress. There was damage that no one knew how to repair. The few science officers on board concluded that the meteors were in a state of flux and they were coated with Malon chemicals they had dumped inside the void. It had a resistant chemical property that allowed it to go through the hull in a gaseous state causing major interior damage auto anything in its path before it evaporated.

One mystery was solved but another and another was forming. Now the crew had to fix the damage and how to make them start moving again. Chakotay,had to keep the crews spirits up but it was hard when a lot of people seemed to distance themselves from him,"Harry as much as I hate to leave you to do all the work I have to go inform the captain on what's been going on." Chakotay said. Harry's eyes lit up whenever the captain was mentioned.

"Um, can I maybe do that for you sir?" He asked sheepishly.

"I would love for you to I really would." He said thinking back to the last few awkward encounters. "But the captain instructed that only myself and the doctor are permitted to visit her.

* * *

That evening Chakotay made his way to Kathryn's quarters. There were rafters from the ceiling on the ground just outside them. She opened the door before he could even chime in. She had her civilian clothes on again and her hair was brushed. It was good that she was doing things in her quarters, she had padds oh information sitting on her table.

"I see you have done a lot of reading." He said striping inside. She nodded simply but did not say anything which was strange for Kathryn. They sat down to dinner but neither had anything to eat. Chakotay felt awkward. What were her intentions exactly? What were his? He had thought a great deal about the encounter days back and couldn't get it out of his head. He actually did feel an attraction, that was the scary part. Not to mention the captain's strange behavior and the fact that she had lacked human contact. But the doctor said she was mentally sound. They started at each other from the opposite sides of the table, neither one making a sound nor speaking a word. You could feel the attention in the air. Kathryn couldn't look him in the eye for too long, she felt the guilt of ruining their relationship, as she nearly had before, when they were on a planet, just the two of them.

"Chakotay," she started,"I am not sure what you are thinking, but I want to explain myself and eggs at I did." She said this in such a voice he had never heard before."I've been having a lot of time to myself, that time I use to think and I think about my mistakes the most. What we are is a mistake."

"Kathryn, we knew about how we could feel. We agreed that it wasn't good for the ship or the crew if we pursue our feelings. It's better."

"But why now? If there was anytime to do something different it would be now."

"Now is a lonely time for everyone. You can't tell me you're not." She faced down

"No I can't, but if we pursue anything, anything at all, I would like it to be out of the crews knowledge... And I need you to come out of hiding."

She looked up at him for a long time. He was a good man, good enough to run her ship and good enough to be her closest friend. They had so many opportunities, but with the ship lost so far from home, they both agreed that there was no time to pursue romantic relationships. Now he was being her friend, nearly begging her to leave her quarters.

"Are you saying that if I come out of here you'll start a relationship with me, as if it's a deal we're making? Sorry Chakotay but I have-"

"I'm not saying that Kathryn, I'm saying that a relationship with me would be hard when you're in the same room everyday. I mean, what if we want to go to my quarters sometime? Ha." Kathryn stared at him for a moment a bit puzzled. "Look I've never been good at these kinds of relationships. Not since my days at the academy. And you know how I don't talk about those days much. I need you to be around if we are going to do anything like this." Chakotay looked out the window, thinking. Relationships since the academy had been more than hard.

* * *

-Chakotay's academy days-

_Chakotay sat under a large elm tree on the ground of Starfleet academy on a bench with too many engravings of past lovers who were long gone. It was his favorite place on the grounds to study. Recently he had been having trouble with the security officers on his attitude he'd been displaying.g toward the professors. Under the tree the problems didn't seem nearly as bad and so much farther away. He had been feeling strange recently about his place in the academy, he felt out of it and easily distracted. His grades were mainly C's not that he or his father really cared. He knew he was better but didn't have the passion to change anything. Now a days he was ha ing strong thought about leaving the academy a d pursue other and possible better opportunities that had been offered to him._

_Even the tree was starting to loose its magic. There were only a few things that sparked his attention. On the bench with him sat a young human girl. Longish dark blonde hair, sweet determined face, and one well fit uniform. She was one of his sparks. Her name was Talia Ferren. They had known each other since Chakotay was eighteen, Talia had been sixteen. She had been a great friend of Chakotay, she had even met members of his father's tribe for the sake of scientific interest. She was fascinated in native beliefs and their culture, she was also fascinated in Chakotay. He found her just as interesting. A human, raised on the moon, whose parents worked in the Klingon embassy, who took, vacations yearly on Vulcan. She had a wide variety of cultures integrated within her personality._

_At that time Chakotay had returned to the academy after two years on a starship for future training. He was 24, talia was in her final year. He was the reason she joined and she was the reason he stayed. It was hard for Chakotay to make friends being such a secluded person. He felt something special for Talia though, hell, he was in love with her._

_Chakotay had spent the day in quantum mechanics class, now with a headache from too much irritating information he read chapter 42 of the temporal mechanics text book. They were the true moments that he hated the most. Talia, with her own padd in her hand looked at him with romantic intent. Chakotay had to smile whenever he saw she had a devious idea, she was a free spirit. Which was surprising since she spent so much time around Klingons._

_"My roommate won't be back for another hour." She said smirking. Chakotay bit his lip trying to decide whether he should continue his work or go with Talia. She was so damn beautiful he thought. Hell of a temporary, but a great sense of adventure and gun. She was fun, and they would have fun. He grinned at her and casually stood up from his bench._

_"Well what are we waiting for?"_

* * *

Kathryn had no idea what Chakotay was thinking, but whatever it was made him silent. He had no emotion on his face but she knew something was hurting him, she knew him well enough that she knew. He did the same thing when something was truly bothering him.

"Alright Chakotay, I'll leave my quarters. But you will stay in command. That iS the best I can do."

Chakotay turned to her with a great smile. He leaned towards her sweeping her in a kiss that was as unexpected to her as it was to him. It was just such great news that he saw the real Kathryn for a moment. And it turned out he truly missed her. Kathryn missed her too, it would be good to feel like her true self again, at least for a little while. There were so many things that were unknown, but the kiss was understood fluently. It was good and it felt good. Chakotay had fun with it. It mea t something to him, especially as it became longer and longer.

"Seven of nine to Chakotay." Her voice announced from his badge. The kiss hastily stopped and he answered trying to shake it off." I think you should come to astrometrics. I reconfigured the censors and have discovered several phenomena inside the void. Including three more meteor fields in front of us." She said seriously.

"I'm on my way. Chakotay-"

"That's not all commander, I have also found evidence of eight more Malon freighters and debris of a single ship. Borg."

Chakotay and Kathryn looked at each other wide eyed. These obstacles had not been seen before by the censors, and would would make it a hell of a lot more difficult to get throughout the void in one piece. If there were Borg out there, there was going to be bloodshed.

* * *

So there's the second chapter. I hope you liked it and there will be more soon.

Sorry for spelling errors, I wrote this on a kindle but please comment, favorite and follow. Thanks!


	3. nothing

**I do not own voyager or its characters**

Chakotay headed to the bridge hastily leaving Kathryn in her quarters still. He was getting closer to getting her out of the dark hole she had dug herself. That wasn't on his mind though, not even the possible Borg. It was the way he felt about Kathryn that occupied his thoughts. He needs errors thought he could feel that way for captain Janeway, but now he did and he liked it. They had tried before for a relationship but it handy been the right time. Now they were in a part of space that seemed like an endless darkness that brought brought everyone's emotions to the surface. People were sad or bored to tears, people were angry, people were going stir crazy. Chakotay had been just like them a week before, but now there was someone who could be with him, someone whom he could express how he felt.

He stepped off the turbo lift, turning to the right and headed for the doors. Seven was waiting for him as eagerly as she could, it that you would ever know. On the screen Chakotay saw a chart of the whole region. Before, a chart showed the region of black space with no signs of life forms, asteroid fields, or debris of any kind. Now seven had reconfigured the censors and could now detect up and coming obstacles. All except the native alien ships. It wasn't really a problem since the species hadn't shown any aggressive intentions recently.

The new censors were able to detect obstacles and anomalies only to a certain extent. It only showed what they were likely to encounter in a month at the most. There was an impressive amount of radiation, too much to see any farther. The screen showed two meteor storms, one only days away and the configured shields were weakened by the previous storm. It was possible that they wouldn't hold through another storm at least not currently.

"Seven, how long will that meteor storm be till it will come into regular censor range? He asked her pointing to the nearest storm.

"Approximately 3 days, seven hours, and twenty four minutes. They are similar to the ones we encountered yesterday." The screen moved to show the calculated path it would take. "Curious, I believe these rocks are native to the void, and yet we have not detected any planets.

"Perhaps it was part of the void species planet. Or maybe what's left of it."

"If it was, it must have been destroyed more than ten centuries ago. According to the reading Lt. Torres conducted."

"They've had long term warp ships for ten centuries?" Chakotay inquired.

"Evidently, they did say they were native to this area of space."

Chakotay returned to his post on the bridge. He passed many crewmen in the corridors, no body smiled at him, no one bothered to say hello. Chakotay smiled and nodded to a few crew members trying to acknowledge them and to get a response. Most of them didn't look at him and the ones who did lost what ever expression that was on their face. Not even former maquis members would acknowledge him. He was like a ghost in the corridors.

She stood in the turbo lift, "Bridge." He said, the computer beeper and started to lift. At least something listens to me, he thought. He turned to where ensign Tal stood anxiously awaiting for their stop to get off. She was always such a friendly person, they would talk sometimes about basically anything they could in the small amount of time they would see each other. But that day she was silent and she tried to avoid eye contact. 'Whats everyone's problem today?' He kept thinking. Everyone has been uncomfortable around him, not just that day but ever since he became acting captain. He didn't know if it was the responsibility of the captain that made them all weary of confronting him, or something he had done as a captain in his few months. Did Kathryn have the same cold shoulder from the crew that he was getting? He was so,used to people talking to him, whether it was a personal problem or a change in assignments, even the occasional catch up conversation. They were all gone. It was only B'Elanna, the other senior officers and Kathryn who he truly felt connected with.

The turbo lift doors opened and Tal hastily exited. She stopped taking for a moment and turned her head to see if he was still watching her. He was. She sigh, smiled at him, nodded her head and continued walking. Chakotay felt even more isolated now, not only did the crew try to avoid him, but they felt the need to force themselves to.

The lift went up two more decks then it let him off on the bridge. Tom was the only regular officer at his post. "Good morning." He said before sitting in his chair.

"Chakotay." Tom said just to say hello. There was a pause of silence. Chakotay stared at the screen, expecting stars as he always did, but they as always weren't there. He always thought it was going to be the last time he would believe something would be there. "Are you ready for the meeting in the conference room?" Tom asked in a reminding tone.

"Excuse me? Oh! Right the meeting, yes let's go. Are the others in there already?" Tom nodded at him as they walked through the doors. The rest of the bridge officers were in their seats talking about ship gossip. B'Elanna was arguing with the doctor, Neelix was talking to Harry, tuvok and the doctor were in their chairs. When Chakotay moved to the front of the room they all took their seats. "Ok who wants to start?" The doctor stood.

* * *

_Winter had come to the academy grounds. It didn't snow but the temperature dropped a good amount. Chakotay walked to his emergency assistance class he was forced to take one semester. He was failing horribly, mainly because he was skipping most of the class's including the one that day; he was just heading in that direction to return to his room. There were some more important things to deal with in there._

_He pulled on Talia's uniform, exposing her shoulder and kissed her up her neck, she smiled and laughed as they moved around the bed_

_"I don't have time for this Chakotay I told you." She said playfully pushing him off. He just grabbed her again._

_"You can make the time, I did." He pulled down the other shoulder and began zipping down her back zipper. She grabbed his back and held it for a moment. Then let go._

_"No. I really can't, I really really don't have time. I have physics class in five minutes and I need to go. I actually want to graduate." She pushed him off again, this time somewhat serious. Chakotay looked at her as she pulled up her uniform and put on her boots. He could see a chunky metal beaded necklace she was attempting to hide with her uniform. It was the one he gave her a few months before. Choker, silver metal beads, black thick string. He was surprised no one had disappointed her for being out of uniform or violating it. They wouldn't let him get a tattoo, not that he really wanted one. It would just make his father happy, but he hadn't seen him in months. She put up her hair into the ugly Starfleet issued bun but she still looked beautiful. _

_"I have to go, but ill see you later." She kissed Chakotay one last time and went out the door. She knew he wasn't very interested in his studies, but she was. She was a great science cadet and a fantastic student. In a few years it was guaranteed that she would be chief science officer of a ship. He had served on ships before, In fact he wasn't technically a cadet anymore. He returned to the academy to receive further training. His former captain thought it would be the best for him since he seemed eager to go against regulations when the chance presented itself. Chakotay usually didn't mean to disobey orders, he had a problem following Starfleet rules, growing up on an native American colony and all. When he did do it purposely it was because the Starfleet rule was morally wrong to him. His captain once ignored a bajoran distros call because it was beyond federation borders. It was a horrible endeavor. _

_After four years at the academy and two years as an ensign serving on star ship after star ship, they made him go back to the beginning. His life was always about him looking forward, and Starfleet made him take one giant step back. It made him angry, enraged would probably be the better word; he had worked so hard to be an officer and then they decided he wasn't good enough yet. Now her questioned if Starfleet was even a fit for him Anymore._

* * *

The doctor gave a long winded speech about an ensign who broke his wrist on the hollow deck after a long argument with two other officers. He said that crew tension was tighter than ever before on Voyager. As if no one had noticed. Then it was B'Elanna's turn to speak.

"Ok we are still having issues with the port nassel but that should be fixed within a day. Frankly that's not the issue, the issue is the new shield configuration. It might not last long." She stopped.

Chakotay held his head. He was tired, tired of far too much, "I'll bite. Why not?"

"They take a lot of energy, a lot. The last time we used them they used up 36 percent of our power supply. We may not make it through the next storm"

"Well find a way!" All fell silent," is there anything else?" They stayed quiet, just watching him. "Dismissed." He stood up and left the room heading for the turbo lift. The doors to the conference room opened letting the rest of them leave. B'Elanna passed him,

"Come with me." She said solidly and kept walking. She walked inside the turbo lift nodding her head telling him to follow. Her tone of voice was worrisome but he got in. He was going there anyway.

"Deck 5." She told the computer. It beeped, closed the doors and headed down. "Computer fault. What the hell has gotten into you Chakotay?!" She yelled.

"What are you talking about?" He yelled back.

"I'm talking about that display in the conference room! Yelling at me, ignoring important issues, day dreaming in a meeting! What's going on with you?"

"Nothing, nothings going on." He quickly answered. B'Elanna changed her expression. Something was going in with him. She needed to know what it was without provoking either of them.

"Come to the mess hall with me. We can talk there." She said softly. Chakotay nodded his head. "Resume."

The turbo lift started again letting them off a few moments later. They walked into ghee mess hall and sat on the couches closest to the door. Neelix saw them and out on his best smile, then swaddled over to them from the kitchen, but before he could go anywhere far B'Elanna waved him away. "So what's going on?" She asked Chakotay.

"I don't know." He said rubbing his face." I think it's the strain of being captain to such an unhappy crew. Have you noticed that?" She nodded." No one will talk to me anymore, either because I'm captain and I'm too hard to approach now, or its soMething I've done."

"I don't think it's anything you've done Chakotay. They just miss Janeway."

"And that's another thing! Kathryn and-" he stopped to think. Telling B'Elanna about the captain and his feeling towards each other could be disastrous. They were in a crisis. There was no time for love affairs as far as the crew was concerned. He looked into her eyes," I wish I could tell you, I really do. But what'd going on with captain Janeway Is only her buisness and only sometimes mine. If there was someone I would want to talk to about it you'd be the first one I can think of." And with that Chakotay stood up and walked away. B'Elanna stayed sitting with a small smile on her face. She loved to talk with him. Chakotay got to thinking about Kathryn.

It was mid afternoon when Chakotay finally visited Janeway's quarters. She let him in quickly but he didn't seem too happy. "What ever happened to you leaving your quarters Kathryn" he asked with sarcasm in his voice.

"Captains prerogative. I'm not needed out on the bridge so why go?"

"I need you! The crew is suffering without you! And there's a meteor storm heading right for us that we cannot avoid. We need you there, especially me." The stress of constant boredom, threat and blackness was becoming too much. Kathryn he'd Chakotay face once he stopped pacing. They looked at each other and she kissed him slowly.

"Okay." She said. Chakotay looked very surprised, surprised that she didn't fight him and that she was going to leave. Really leave this time. "Ok."


	4. failure

**CHAP 4: failure**

* * *

_Chakotay sat staring at his grades on his bed. The news wasn't good, his grades were worse than they were back in high school, and it was hard to be worse than a D. He had a D in three classes. The only class he thought he was doing well in was temporal mechanics. Only because it was the easiest class where every hypothetical question had the answer,'Dont fuck with the space time continuum!' Simple answer to everything. Only a hand full of star ships even had the opportunity to change the timeline of history, and everything least seemed normal. _

_The unfortunate point was he was struggling. He didn't understand, he had done so well the first time he was in the academy. What had changed? Everytime he tried to figure it out Talia came to mind; but she was the reason he was doing so well in his command structure class. She was the reason he went to temporal mechanics class. She was the reason he did his last three reports. She was the reason he stayed. Starfleet had taken so much from him, his post, his command, his uniform, and sent him back to academy. But if there was one good thing they did for him, it was her. Being there with her; they may have not met her in Starfleet, but it helped them spend a lot of time together and help them grow closer. He never felt closer to anyone. _

_It was evening on the academy grounds. The golden gate bridge was covered in a deep fog and the city was lit up in the distance. Chakotay had been given officers quarters instead of the normal dorm rooms the average cadet received. They saw no harm since he was just doing an extra year, and he had been an officer, once. It was nice quarters. It was split leveled and had a Se__perate bedroom from the rest of the room. It was better than his quarters on a few posts. He looked around his quarters. It was somewhat empty. Just a few of his possessions here and there, a sculpture his father made him take, a few native artworks and his clothes. He was alone in his quarters. Staring at his grade reports, he couldn't do anything else but stare and yell at himself for doing something as stupid as let his grades go so low. It was so easy the first time he was there. He enjoyed himself and had no questions about where he belonged. Now he wasn't so sure._

_"Ferren to Chakotay." His comm badge announced, he smiled._

_"Yes Talia I'm here."_

_"Do you want to meet me at the bar?" He heard loud music and people chatting in the distance._

_"Sounds to me like you're already there. Ill beam down in a few minutes." He didn't plan on waiting. He'd rather do anything than sit there._

_Chakotay walked into the bar a minute later seeing that he had nothing better to do in his quarters. Talia was waiting for him on the bar in her regular stool. A tarkalian was tending the bar, he had left several empty glasses in front of Talia, which obviously meant that she had been there for a while. She waved him over in a semi buzzed fashion. Chakotay couldn't help but grin at her cute wave. Perhaps she was more tipsy than buzzed. He sat at the bar with her non the less, she hugged him at the side and called over the tender for another drink._

_"How long have you been here? And why?" He said ordering his regular betazoid burban. _

_"Umm, probably an hour... don't judge me on I've had a rough day. I got my grade report, two C's! What the hell did I do to get two cs?" She complained. Chakotay laughed lifting up his drink and swallowing the whole thing._

_"You think you have it bad? I have three D's!" They started laughing, picking up another drink after another. It was their favorite bar. The only one in the area that served real alcohol. Whatever they were drinking was working fast. _

_"You do realize we are laughing at our failure? God we suck!" Talia joked. Chakotay looked at her grabbing her face. Suddenly he kissed her greatly. He did for as long as he could. She took his head rubbing her hands in his dark hair. He final withdrew to breathe. _

_"We totally suck." He said back. She smiled then released her hair from her pointy tail. Chakotay had messed it up when he grabbed her head. He loved when her hair was up like that because he could vividly see her spots. Talia considered herself human but she was one fourth trill and she had a few but clear trill spots on her body. They were still apparent in many generations even with just one trill ancestor like she had, her grandfather. Another round of drinks was given to them. "Toast for failure?"_

* * *

It was only O six hundred hours on voyager but Chakotay was already up and about around the ship. No one but the senior officers and the night shift were awake at that time. Most crewmember wouldn't wake up for another half hour, Chakotay enjoyed the time when no one was was wandering about the corridors; he didn't use to but since he became acting captain and the crew was having such an issue, it was nice to not have anyone staring at him.

Kathryn had said "okay." Whatever that meant, but he hoped it meant that she was coming back to work. It was what she had said yes to, but shed been saying that she would come back for a week and never did. He headed to her quarters and buzzed the door. Then it was a waiting game. Would she answer in her civilian clothes, her hair down in a mess of tangles; or would she appear in her uniform, her hair perfect? To see her in her glory, with her uniform ready to take command again of her dreary sad crew would be more attractive to Chakotay than anything else. The waiting game was growing tiring though. He didn't believe he would see that glory, at least not that day. He hoped someday soon. But when the turbo lift doors opened his jaw nearly dropped, he stared into it wide eyed.

"What are you doing standing around? We've got work to do." Kathryn said demandingly with her trade mark smile. Chakotay smiled back at her and joined her in the turbo lift. The doors closed, it moved up to the bridge.

"Thank you Kathryn." He whispered in her ear, too happy to speak it normally. It was amazing to have her back. She was his rock, he was her right hand man. That was there relationship on duty; now that Kathryn seemed willing to get back to work, Chakotay didn't know what it was off duty. But if he had to sacrifice their relationship in order to have Kathryn working again, he'd do it. Their romantic relationship was was new and barely existent anyway. The crew needed her more than he did. He thought that as the doors to the lift opened onto the bridge of Voyager. Harry and Tom were at the pilot station looking over the schematics of the up-and-coming obstacles that seven had recorded. Chakotay and Kathryn stepped off onto the bridge; Chakotay couldn't hold back a smile. Everyone tu rned to look at the captain and they all had the same expression of excitement. Something Chakotay hadn't seen in a long time. The captain stood before her chair, everyone stood in respect. Paris stepped towards Chakotay.

"Good job. Don't know how you did it but good job." He said in all seriousness. Kathryn smiled at her crew, especially Chakotay. She finally sat in her chair and the rest of the crew followed.

"I would like to thank you all for your patients. I have reinstituted command of voyager from Chakotay to myself. And I'd like to say it's about time I-" she stopped speaking suddenly. Her head and Harry's was facing the view screen which showed the asteroid/meteor field... two days ahead of schedule. "What the hell!"

"Chakotay to B'Elanna! We need those shields now! Tom why the hell is so close? And why did the censors say it was days away?" He yelled. B'Elanna was at the engineer station on the bridge pushing buttons trying to spoken up the process. Tom checked censors.

"They aren't online yet! I thought I had at least another day till they needed to be ready! I can give you the old shields, maybe a little more power but that's it! I'm sorry commander!"

"Commander, I think what we saw was a censor echo ahead of the field. Seven and couldn't have known. No one could have." It moved closer and closer at nearly warp speed. The shields were up but they were no match for the irradiated rock, it was to big to go around even for Tom.

"Tuvok, what are our options?" She asked.

"As of this moment, I believe the best course of action is to continue modifying the shields to the last possible second. We will be overtaken by this; It is inevitable. That is the only option I see fit." He said without a single worried tone. B'Elanna of course was already on it. No one blamed her for not having the shields ready yet, but the fact that they didn't would have dire consequences.

Minutes went by the entire bridge crew was doing whatever they could to get the shields as strong and most radiation resistant as they could get. Tom stood next to B'Elanna, editing shield configurations as fast as she was creating them. She talked and forth with the engineering crew, giving vorik exact instructions on how to configure the shield output. Another few minutes. Kathryn put the ship on red alert, tuvok made a few adjustments to phazors. Another minute. The field was two away.

"There. That's the best I can do without changing the entire system." It wasn't nearly as much of a change as she would have made, but it's what she could do in a five minute period. The only thing left was to see if it would work, or fail horrifically. No one had much hope though, the closest meteor was at least half the size of voyager; without the shields it could easily destroy the ship. These were huge, no where near the sizes of the ones in the last storm. They were giants. Survival was low and everyone knew it. Tom stood holding hands with B'Elanna at her station, waiting for the rocks but not giving up all hope. "Lets hope we don't die." She said tightening her grip on to me hand.

"I remember when Talia died." Chakotay said softly and lowly to himself. He didn't mean to say it but the situation, all life or death situations reminded him of her, her death. "Lets see what happens next."

Tom went to his station, Harry took a seat next to the captain on one of the built in stools. Ten seconds.."Brace for impact." Kathryn said over the comm system. Five seconds to impact.


	5. Casualties

**Casualties -** _please leave comments of how you feel about the story so far_

* * *

All was still in the blackened space voyager called the void. Not a star lit their way nor a distant asteroid. There was nothing out there, not another ship, a planet or a single piece of stray garbage. Nothing but a giant ship and it's crew struggling to survive. No one was managing tactile, no one was checking warp field output, no one was steering the ship. It did that manually, and there was nothing to navigate. The ship was on auto pilot as it had been for many months. It was like every other day on voyager where no one had to do their jobs because there was no job to do. The day was just like every other day, except the ship wasn't moving, and no one was at their station because they were unconscious. If not dead. What did this, near two light years away. Systems were crashing, beams were falling, alerts flashing, life support failing. The ship was in tact externally, there were many bumps and breaches, Deck 12 might as well have been gone. Internally the ship was in thousands of pieces. The asteroids had penetrated the shields half way through the storm. It it wasn't for the last minute adjustments it would have been crippled with absolutely no survivors.

The bridge only had the sounds of censors, alerts and moans of pain from unconscious crew members. Tuvok, B'Elanna and Tom were all collapsed at their stations. Chakotay and the captain had been hurled from their chairs when a 20 ton rock barely got through the shields. It was the first one to penetrate and it made sure everyone was watching when it hit. It bounced off the ship after its speed had weakened from the shields, but it gave way to nearly a hundred more rocks to come. All after were easily able to damage the ship in their own way, most knocking out power grids and causing overloads. Whenever one hit the ship it would twist to that direction at five g's of force which knocked out most of the crew if they hadn't been already by hitting their head or from a plasma explosion. Barely anyone stayed awake through the entire thing but if they were the horrors they witnessed would haunt them forever.

* * *

Deck two section 13. The mess hall was where everyone went to eat or talk in groups when not on duty. Over 20 crew members had been in the mess hall when they were first hit. Everything in neelixs kitchen was in disarray, post from the kitchen ended up against the opposite wall of the room. Neelix himself had been thrown against the bulkhead in the back of the storage room. People were just starting to come around, it a few, it was hard to tell if others were just still unconscious or dead. It was easy to tell that crewman Chel was dead, not so much if neelix was. Ensign Tal and crewman Douglas were some of the first to come to. Neither of them had been hit with any objects or were slammed into anything. In those kinds of situations the first thing an officer was supposed to do was assess and triage but Tal was a weary thing, she was overtaken by what she saw. Fifteen crew members all with serious damage, overthrown tables, debris flying by through the window. People covered in chairs and table all which had been jerked to the ground or knocked from their hinges. Tal started pulling tables off crewmembers near the door. She found Ltd. Morris with his head against the wall surrounded by shards of glass from a broken plate. He had a pulse but so faint that she began to thought it was the vibrations of the ship.

Douglas brought Neelix to his feet, he had some cuts and a first degree burn from a hot pot but he was non the worse. He being the loyal crewman that he was, Neelix insisted on going to the bridge to do whatever he could to help. Despite Douglas's suggestion neelix left hastily leaving the two other able officers to once again continue their analysis. They saw that the largest table in the corner was covering two officers and both moved to get it off. One of the support beams had been loosened in one of the hits and was now leaning on the table. It was probably about seventy pounds of heavily concentrated metal leaned against a twenty pound table which covered three people. It wouldn't be an easy feet to remove it. Her and Douglas braced their backs against it an pushed it with all their strength, it didn't sound too difficult to the angle that it was at with the combined fact that it was still somewhat attached to the ceiling didn't help.

"Do you remember what happened, do you know?" Douglas asked Tal in the midst of the pushing.

"No!" She answered feeling the top of the bulkhead finally break. "All I remember is being hit for the fourth time and then... nothing. I- I've never been knocked out before. I was wide awake and the..." She started contemplating but helped Douglas remove the table. He was strangely calm through the entire situation at that point, probably because he had seen worse in the maquis.

They removed the table revealing the trapped crew members, they were all Starfleet security officers who had been laughing and eating together, swapping stories about family and enemies back home. Talk knew them well though she wasn't security. She had been eating with them when the first meteor hit the shields, she had stood up and attempted to leave for astrometrics but she obviously didn't get too far, she got to the doors and collapsed. She took the recorder one was holding to check their vitals. All were alive miraculously but their vitals were unstable. Two needed surgery the third was fine and woke up when he was tapped.

"Wake up!" A voice was heard not by any officer. "Wake up!" They turned the the left entrance door where the small voice was coming from. It was becoming more stressed and upset with each yell, more high, and more worried. They were sitting over the body of a blue shirted ensign that from a distance couldn't be identified. "Wake up!" They yelled again. Douglas went to her and keeled down to where the frightened crewmember. His voice and expression had no worry. No emotion whatsoever and get you could see compassion in his eyes. He took the crewmans hand.

"Calm down Naomi. It'll be fine. Your mother will be fine." He Saud to the young girl crouching over Samantha's body. He took the tricorder from Tal to scan her. He read it for a long time with still no expression. He moved it up and down her body again and again and again, an eternity for Naomi. Then he final stopped looking, his expression had changed. His mouth was open but but the way he wore it made it mean anything, it could have meant anything. "She's fine Naomi. Can you go get the doctor, see if he's still online?" He said calmly

"Can I see it?" Naomi said pointing the the tricorder being the scientist she was. She was always questioning everything.

"There's no time Naomi. I need you to go." Douglas Saud not even raising his voice. Naomi returned the same face to him stood up and left for the medical bay. Once she was gone Douglas stood up and closed the scanner.

"How is she really Douglas?" Tal asked knowing his expression was just a mask. He turned to her giving the same as he had given Naomi, mouth slightly open, eyes compassionate yet subtle.

"She's certainly not okay. Shes, alive. But barely so I don't know." He shrugged. "I don't know."

* * *

_Chakotay walked talia to her dorm to be sure she didn't fall on the way there(because she was drunk as hell). But it wasn't just for that or for the injection of anti alcoholic toxins, it was because he enjoyed her company. Everyday they would swap stories with one another about home, latest academy gossip, or the crazy things Talia would think of. She was a fascinating beautiful girl. She had many friends on the academy tennis team she was on which she was often with, she was a champion at tennis. She had less spots than the average trill but they made her face twice as attractive, she had the body of a dancer and the muscle of an athlete and the brain of a scientist. She was destined for great things and great people. With the way she looked she could have anyone she wanted but everyone was boring to her, aNd her connection to Chakotay was tighter than anyone she had ever known._

_They walked inside the dorm and immediately found the injection to make them sober. It was fun to be drunk for a while but twenty-four century kids preferred to have their brains in tact. It was basically a hypo spray but it gave you a headache afterwords that you couldn't get rid of. The both injected themselves with it and the world through the eyes of alcohol disappeared with a headache. _

_"Well there we go." Tailia said as she rolled her shoulders. She sat on her bed of her small form room and lay back with her feet still on the ground. Her bed was a mess of tangled sheets and clothes. The bed next to hers was made up with clothes folded and bags gone. Talia's roommates bed, a bolian. She headed for the month on a field assignment to Saturn. Talia was scheduled for a mission two months later to the Kardashian border for her assignment._

_Chakotay moved her to the edge of her tiny twin sized bed and threw her legs on top of his then handed her a padd with her report on it. She started working on it without saying a word to each other, they didn't mind, they were content with doing their own things. Chakotay reached and grabbed for a book on her roommates dresser._

_"I think you have a transmission on you computer." Chakotay said as he started reading. The computer had been beeping since they had gotten in and it was starting to get irritating to him. Talia took her legs back and opened the transmission which was in written form. It was common to get letters from her dad or brother. As she read Chakotay stared at the book but his head was too full and pounding to concentrate, concentrate on anything but his grades. They were so bad, he was nearly failing three classes; and talia, who was staring wide eyed at the computer screen was thriving. "So, anything good?" He asked pulling his nose up. _

_She slowly stepped back to the bed. Her hand was on her stomach and her face was a pale white, she couldn't sit down, couldn't breathe. Chakotays face changed with worry, for Talia didn't get upset like this. He stood up from the bed somewhat scared and braced __her shoulders with his hands. "What happened Talia?" He whispered. She kept her face._

_"My brother died." She said with the same tone in her voice. Chakotays face became even more worrisome as she spoke so he took her head and leaned it against his chest. He put his hands on her back and head. Her expression turned to sadness and she closed her eyes. Tears rolled down her face but she didn't make a sound. Chakotay let her lean against his chest as she quietly grieved and didn't mind. Her brother was her world, more a part of it than he was. Her brother Cado had been serving aboard the Uss. Crassus which patrolled the bad lands. He had transferred to the ship from the Vortex only two weeks before which is when they last spoke. They had talked for two hours straight, but now talia was at a loss for words._

* * *

Deck by deck, one by one, life started to return on the ship. People were walking with horrible injuries, concussions, broken limbs. The turbo lifts weren't working either which meant they were disconnected from the doctor. The command center had taken heavy damage on the bridge do communication quality was poor at best. That didn't stop anyone or everyone from talking on it. Kim awoke to the comm traffic and ringing in his ears, he thought all the noise was in his head or a dream. But he started to look around the bridge seeing an unconscious crew and debris through the view screen. Beams had fallen and smoke was coming out of the ceiling. An ensign next to him was missing a hand and was surely dead. He touched his own head and his hand felt the thick warn sensation of blood spewing out of his forehead. No. This was too real to be a dream.


	6. I Got You

**please read and comment and etc. I hope you've liked the story so far. And once again sorry for spelling, wrote all of it on a kindle!**

* * *

Everyone seemed to have forgotten what silence sounded like. On the bridge there were too many noises. It sounded of groans and shouts and cries, like a heavy animal population in the Savannah. The alarm signaling red alert would go off every once in a while, censors would beep at nothing, reports were coming on all over the ship onto tactile station, and comm badges continuously shattered. Harry started to wake crewmen on the bridge. B'Elanna and Chakotay woke up on their own but that didn't mean they were nearly okay. Her forehead was smashed and her shoulder was dislocated by her chair. Chakotay found it hard to breathe, his lung or rib was injured, it wasn't the smoke in the air though there was an abundance of it. They both looked out at the view screen expecting and fearing another incoming rock hurling towards them but once again there was just darkness outside. No stars or planets or alien ships or asteroids. It was as if nothing had ever been there at all, or whatever was there had disappeared like a ghost. The asteroids field had disappeared so quickly and left no debris fRom itself, had it all moved away or had Voyager?

Immediately Chakotay realized that other had to be attended to and turned to B'Elanna. He started at her dislocated shoulder as she did. "Here, let me help."

"No don't touch it!" She crawled back snarling. Chakotay pulled back his arm in confusion at her tone, she knew he had a gentle hand. "I- I've got it she said." She stood on her knees and grabbed above her elbow and definitely hissed in pain. "This is gonna be loud... and I'm not talking about my arm." He smiled for a moment. She held her arm tight, her mouth wide open, breathing heavily; she changed her grip on her arm and without another second passing pushed her limp arm up. The arm moved up into its socket as B'Elanna let out a blood curling Klingon scream; the arm slid in like butter and quality moment later was completely usable. The scream she let our awoke a few crewmembers from their unconscious rouse startled and on pain. Harry helped up one as Chakotay and B'Elanna braced each other against each other to stand up.

"Computer, status." Chakotay said to the walls struggling to breathe. The only response was static which meant all verbal commands or command codes weren't functioning. The computer couldn't do anything! He couldn't face the distraction of the ship and without the computer repairs would go so much slower and harder. The crew wouldn't be able to order food

B'Elanna stood up not putting too much weight on her left foot and observed the state of the bridge. She limped to the captain's chair console and started pushing buttons. The red alert alarms, sounds and lights were cancelled and changed to red alert. Everyone stared at her. "It was getting annoying. The alarms I mean." They continued staring at her for another moment and then went on to helping everyone else. Tuvok was the next to wake up from behind his console, not surprisingly he had minor damage to himself. Suddenly beanbag started moving frantically. "Wheres Tom?" She yelled dropping her tools and moving to his station. Half of the view screen was blocked with beams and runnable that dropped from the ceiling or walls. Three beams perfectly tented Tom's consul and station. B'Elanna crawled in between two paying kind to her injured foot. It was just a few feet of space but it felt like a great forest of metal. She saw Tom very quickly, he was covered in metal sheets and plating and it seemed as though he had moved a smaller beam from on top of his abdomen. But he wasn't moving now.

She crawled over to him to move some of the metal sheets that covered him. They weren't heavy but sharp as hell. She swiped the sheets away from Tom and held his head to try and wake him up. She could hear him breathing and feel his pulse but he had horrible cuts in his side and arms. Even her legs which he up his head was turning red with blood from his side. "Tom... Tom!" She started yelling shaking his head. "I need the doctor! Tom won't wake up!" She yelled to the crew outside the beam structure.

"Relax B'Elanna... I'm not dead yet." She heard. Tom's eyes were still closed but his mouth and legs were moving.

"Tom! You're ok." She yelled with deep relief In her voice.

"Yeah. I'm all good let's get to work." He said sarcastically, "Think you can get me out of here?" Somehow Chakotay heard him and inched his way into the small entrance.

"We got you Tom." He said calmly.

* * *

_Chakotay had stood with Talia for over ten minutes until he inched close enough to her bed to sit without disturbing her. She leaned her head on his broad shoulders still barely making a sound. That was one thing Chakotay found interesting, she was usually a very emotional person when it came to the negative feelings; anger, annoyance, sadness, stress. It were the positive emotions she usually kept in check , never letting too much get out about herself or how she felt, except when it came to Chakotay because he had the same personality. But he still sat with her._

_Cado was a lieutenant on the Crassus, a vortex class ship with high weapons output and a powerful hull. Whatever took it down was powerful. The ship had been near the bad lands when it sent out a distress call, a nearby ship intercepted it and was there within 5 hours, but by that time the Ship was in two pieces and only one piece still had life support, that seemed to a miracle within a tragedy. Cadillac was exposed to the vacuum of space and died immediately. They had been patrolling the demilitarized zone by the bad lands, Cado was next in line for chief of security on the Crassus. He always thought Talia would be an excellent security officer too but her heart was set on the sciences. His average day consisted of him either on the bridge or a security terminal on deck 15 which was the bottom deck of the ship. _

_"You're not leaving are you?" Talia suddenly asked. Chakotay repositioned his right arm._

_"No. No. I've got you Talia."_

_They sat for a long time, until Talia fell asleep on his shoulder. He put her on her bed and went home. Her emotions were strange and he didn't like them. He liked her in her usual way, but I mild tempered automaton was not Talia. He'd return in the morning. May be by then shed be a little more like herself. Looking back on that moment later he realized how horrible his thoughts had been but at the time it was far from his mind. He went back into his quarters to sleep off what he had been through that day, it had been a bad one. Probably the worst day of Talia's life. Her brother was everything to her from the day they could remember each other. Chakotay knew this, but he was more worried about Talias personality than her overall state. He lied down in bed with a paddle in his hand on alpha quadrant anomalies and eventually fell asleep. _

* * *

They pulled Tom out into the open bridge and by that time most of the people who could were standing. Harry held the captain's shoulder over his own, her knee was bleeding through her uniform but if she was in pain she didn't show it.

"Is everyone alright?" She asked in her loud announcing voice. O obviously everyone was not but she needed to know the status of those who were awake and standing. People answered with body parts bleeding, limbs injured, ears ringing, problems breathing. When people said that their legs hurt but they were still walking she had a suspicion that they may be worse than even they thought. Because of the crash their bodies were pumping with adrenaline so they weren't feeling the full extent of the damage that their bodies had taken. A limp could be a sprain and a sprain could just as easily be a break. Her own leg she pretty certain was just sprained but she felt it. Her main concern was for the crew though. How could she have abandoned them for so long? And now when she finally came out again one of the worse incidents Voyager ever faced occurs and she can't do anything about it.

"Captain. I believe I have earned the interference, I am now getting full reports in written form from all over the ship." Said Tuvok.

"Well... Let's hear it." The captain gulped bracing herself on Harry, a trusted friend. Silence. Everyone knew just looking at the state of the bridge that there was no way everyone was alive.

"Reports are coming in every minute, but currently there are reports that 12 are confirmed dead, 19 critical, and over 63 injured including ourselves." He said almost emotionally. In the history of voyager, it was the heaviest of injuries with a grand to total of 84. The reports came from all over the ship, but the least amount of injuries came from the lower and central decks.

"And matter anti matter containment is weakened. It's as if we were hit by weapons not rocks. It basically the same damage capacit." B'Elanna added turning her system back on. "I estimate it will take over a month to get the ship back to its original state captain."

"That's not important right now, what is is helping the rest of the crew. We have less than our 146 compliment now everyone, and I don't want to lose a signal other person understand. Get your team to work B'Elanna then get the doctor online if he isn't already. We can put any injured in the mess if they don't fit in sick bay. We have a lot of injured here people. Dismissed." This sudden announcement from the captain showed her crew that she was back to the way they always knew her to be. The way she had been was a personal matter that no one, could ever understand completely. They had no idea of the the burdens she carried since standing the crew in the delta quadrant. She had been reliving it which was a lot to handle, but now she was the captain again. Captain Janeway.

Chakotay and some of the other slightly injured bridge officers made their way to the sick bay to treat themselves. Bleeding foreheads, injured lungs, possible interior bleeding, and sprains were things that even a third year security cadet knew how to fix. As long as the bleeding was minor and the lucky g wasn't perforated they would be fine in only a few minutes of treatment. The obstacle was getting to the sick bay. They were on deck one and the sick bay was on deck five and the turbo lifts were offline and broken. The Jeffrey's tubes were the only way to go.

Chakotay, B'Elanna and a few other crew members Belgian there long, slow and painful decent down the shafts. One deck took four minutes to clear and so th e y did in mostly silence. It was hard to breathe especially for Chakotay. Everyone hurt and was tired and scared, it was hard to hide it though everyone tried to. They weren't nearly as hurt as others were. People were dead from this, a giant space rock had killed them they kept thinking.

"How's your head?" Chakotay joked having more and more difficulties breathing, his words shortening and his breath gaining length.

"Fine, just a headache, how's your lung." She asked with concern noticing his difficulty.

"Perfect!" She cringed. Suddenly grabbing his chest and clenching his uniform.

"Chakotay?"

"It's okay. Just can't seem to be breathing correctly. I think you should go without me ill match up, I just need a moment to catch my breath."

"You four go, ill stay with the commander." B'Elanna waved them off. They contined down the turbo o lift without another glance to the two of them. "You shouldn't be alone in your condition."

"B'Elanna, I can catch up with you and you need to treat yourself and May be fix the doctor. Go, that's an order." He Saud seriously. B'Elanna nearly snarled with amusement ignoring his command. "Fine. But I'm fine now. Let's go." He said standing up and started down the ladder."

"Are- are you sure?" B'Elanna asked going after him down the shaft after him.

"I told you I would have caught up with you." He smiled up to her," I'm pretty sure I can-" he stopped once again holding his uniform and breathing heavily. He began weazing and his face turned a darker red.

"Chakotay?" B'Elanna yelled to him but He didn't answer her. The next thing she saw was him losing his grip on the ladder and falling three feet to the lower landing of deck four. "Chakotay!" She raced down three rungs and jumped on to the platform where he lay. She yelled down the next shaft frantically. "I need help!"

She put her head up and stared at Chakotay who no doubt was barely breathing. As she heard the sound of the other racing up the shaft she keeled down to his lever and held his head hoping that contact may wake him. "I got you Chakotay, just hold on."


	7. Dream

Down ladders, through does, heaving breathing, grunting, shouts. Passed fallen conduits, fallen crewmembers, rubble. Doors being forced open, more shouting, a thump. Only sounds and feelings. Chakotay was being carried by his other fellow injured crewmen trying to keep him alive. Two open the doors of sick bay with their bare hands while the others keep him off the ground. The doors open and they run inside putting him of the center joined while B'Elanna messes with the controls of the station in front of the doctors office. The cons makes negative sounds as she tries to override sub routines and fire walls.

"I'm having difficulties activating the doctor. Don't just stand there give em a hypo spray or something. Let's get moving!" B'Elanna ordered. She compensated, over rid and did everythinG she could to make the doctor appear. One of the crewmen injected Chakotay with a hypo spray labeled to help breathing issues. It was the best they could do since no one there was a doctor.

The doors were forced open from the other entrance where the doctor performed experiments. It was two ensigns, one with severe burns the other with a wrapped arm. Behind them came Neelix, alone with no serious injuries but frantically looking about the room.

"Wheres the doctor?" He panicked to B'Elanna. "I need supplies. People are hurt. Really really hurt!"

"The doctors off line, trying to fix it now." She grunted.

Neelix started looking about the room grabbing hypo sprays, stimulators and monitors in hand and left within two minutes. B'Elanna ignored his insanity and continued her work. Crewman Xeni was just finishing up putting a regenerator on her leg and walked over and began treating B'Elannas head without saying a word. Neither stopped working.

"Got it!" She jumped activating the final sequence.

"Please state the nature of- dear God, what happened?" The doctor gasped.

"The ship experienced major damage from the asteroid field, over 50 are wounded 20 are dead let's go fix Chakotay." She said in one continuous sentence leading the doctor by the arm. The doctor scanned Chakotay. A perforated left lung, a serious injury but simple to fix if you were the doctor.

"It will take a half hour of treatment but after that he should be fine. In fact you can administer it. It's a simple procedure and by the look of my sick bay there are most likely more serious injuries to treat." He said handing the instrument to Xeni and grabbing a med kit. He put on his mobile emitter and began treating three other patients who had just walked in.

Xeni treated Chakotay on the bio bed. He was still unconscious from both the fall and the lack of oxygen. But his brain seemed wide awake.

* * *

_Chakotay was in a forest. A forest of red green trees and jungle plants. He knew this place, his father had taken him there when he was a teenager to meet reminisce of his tribe. His father was extremely irritating on that trip to him, at least as a younger boy. Strange birds sang in the highest of tree tops but were loud enough that they seemed be be chirping in your ear. He heared the sounds of animals walking on the forest floor on decomposing leaves and could smell the nectar of the native red flowers. It was so real so much like he remembered it to be. He walked forward and could hear and feel the dry leaves crack under his Starfleet boots. He moved through the trees to a clearing of dirt and broken leaves surrounded by the rainforest trees with an extinguished campfire in the center. There was no smoke but there was a smell of it in the air. There was non in the sky, non from the ground, maybe it was just the coals of the campfire still burning. _

_The most intriguing and prominent smell was the smell of a fresh rain fall which it often did in that jungle. Chakotay used to love it when it rained there, it briefly dissipated the humidity in the air and gave off a cool relief from the heat if only for a short moment. It was his favorite smell, but in that jungle it was always mixed with the smell of sweet nectar from the red flowers. Everything just seemed so real. Was this a dream? Chakotay kept thinking in the very back of his mind. It's hard to focus on what was dream and reality when you are asleep. Even though Chakotay had been able to separate himself from before this wasn't one of those cases. He was unaware that what,he was seeing was just a simulation created by his brain. Flashes of memory from every direction, what,he was seeing started to lose focus and in a blink of an eye everything he had seen was gone. It flowed into new vision of his old academy quarters. He Started forgetting where he was moments before and now the main focus was the room. It was just as he remembered it and just as empty. He found his things all in the center of the room and nothing else. Everything he had lost during his academy days all in one pile in the middle of the room. Shirts, bracelet, reports and more reports, assignments, a uniform, a blanket. In another blink of an eye Talia was also standing in the pile. She was in her blue science cadet uniform with her hair up and a straight face. _

_"It's all your fault I'm here!" She suddenly claimed in an ominous way. He jumped back_

* * *

"Commander hold still." He heard. Chakotay nearly jumped off the bio bed with every waking muscle. He shook himself awake and played back down of the table. He saw that crewman Xeni was for some reason treating his chest. He didn't know her very well, just that she worked in the weapons bay. He looked around the sick bay now overflowing with injuries and blood. The lights kept flickering and the computer system kept shorting.

"How long have I-" Chakotay started.

"About 30 or so minutes sir." She said holding him down. "Hold still please I'm almost done."

"Do you know what you're doing?"

"You're breathing aren't you?" She answered sarcastically as if somewhat angry that she was there.

"Something wrong crewman?" Chakotay asked loudly.

"My weapons bay is in ruins sir." She said not even looking up at him. He stopped his talking knowing anything be said would just provoke the bajoran. He knew Xeni for a while and knew that her temperament was almost as bad as B'Elannas. " I'm done. Let's get back to work shall we?"

Chakotay stood up staring at the crewmen as she walked away. What had happened to her since the last time they spoke that made her so hostile? Was it the void and the desolate space? But she was right. There wAs so much damage, the ship was half destroyed and the crew was hurt. He needed to detach himself from his own personal feelings whether they be physical or emotional. He was one in a crew of over a hundred. He would give his life for the crew just as they did for him and Kathryn every day. Which led him to another thought. Especially in these times, a relationship was just to far out of the quesrion. At least for the time being.


	8. Be Willing

_Two weeks had gone by since the death of Talias brother. She was doing better, she was back to herself again in Chakotays eyes. She would smile and go to the hollodeck and go to the bar and meet up with friends. He wasn't worried about her anymore, she was more worried about him. That month Chakotay had gotten a message from his father about cardassions raiding nearby villages. He slept with a phaser under his pillow every night and patrolled throughout the day. His father wrote of how he and others had modified a few federation shuttles to fire quantum torpedoes, a dangerous thing to have strapped to a little ship. What was more troubling was that his near elderly father was piloting such a ship! His father was never a very violent person unless you tried to hurt him or mess with his property. Chakotay didn't understand what his father was fighting for or why, or how he got involved in such a thing like attacking giant cardassian ships. It seemed like an act of terrorism which he was obligated to report to a full ranking officer immediately. But Chakotay wasn't by any means an upstanding officer in anyone's eyes. He wasn't going to turn in his father to the almighty Starfleet that knew all and had the final say in everything. No, even if his father was a COMPLETE idiot, he wasn't going to tell anyone about his plans; not even Talia. He kept telling himself that his father had reason for whatever the hell he was doing out there, even if it was stupid... So stupid. _

_He kept reading the transmitting in bed, going over every stupid detail his father had carefully written. He kept saying it was for the good of the community and that he had a duty to keep families in their homes. But he didn't know everyone in,the colony, or have any duty to protect them, he was an old man who was in no proffesion that obligated him to protect anyone. The only thing that would explain everything g to Chakotay was to talk to his father, so he got out of bed and opened a transmitting to anywhere on his father's colony that he thought he could be. His home, a ship, the pub. He waited but it didn't take very long for his father's face to appear on the screen of his consul. _

_"Chakotay! What a surprise to have you call me. It's been so long." The old man said with a great smile._

_"How have you been dad?" Chakotay asked._

_"Days are long when you are protecting hundreds of people. How have you been my boy? Are you on one of your ships right now? No how could you I can see the ocean right behind you!" _

_"It's shore leave dad." Chakotay thought quickly. He hadn't told his dad Starfleet had sent him back the academy and didn't plan to. His father would go mad. "Besides this isn't about me. Dad, what the hell are you doing out there? Do you honestly believe you're making a difference by taking on giant ships?" _

_"My boy it doesn't matter if what I'm doing makes a difference or not, I just want to keep this community safe, and since we refused to leave those spoon heads have been stalking us from the skies! It's not right what they're doing! I'm doing what I'm doing to keep those bastards out of my colony! Don't you understand that these people are my family?"_

_"It's not like you them all!" He heared the door open behind him._

_"It doesn't matter!" He replied quickly, "These people don't deserve what has been,happening to them. We are bound together by what we've gone through, that makes us family which makes us willing to die for each other. Don't you know what it's like to be willing to die for someone whom you care about." __Chakotay turned around and saw Talia standing behind him listening tentatively. "Hello there." _

_Chakotay eyes grew wide slightly mortified at his father greeting the woman he loved. She smiled at his father a nodded slightly; she was holding a padd with both her hands and was in civilian clothes. "Hold on." He said to the screen and muted it then completely turned around in his chair to face Talia. "I didn't know you were coming over." He said seriously._

_"Well you asked me to proof read your report so I did and I'm done. I came to return it to you, and maybe do something else." She said with her mischievous smile. _

_"I'd like that I would, but this is very important. And I need to finish this conversation. Come back later?" He asked growing a smile back. She smiled back to him and nodded leaving the padd on his bed. Immediately after she left his smile disappeared not because it wasn't real but because that was what his father did to him. He made him sultry. He murmured the screen. "Sorry."_

_"Who was that?" His father said moving his head trying to get with better view of Chakotays room. _

_"Dad-" He tried to stop him._

_"She's pretty. One of your fellow officers or a girl you picked up in g he local bar? Where are you anyway? On earth?"_

_"Father! Please don't talk about Talia." Chakotay protested but immediately regretted it realizing revealing her name was an error._

_"Talia? Hmm, are you two serious? Is she an officer too?" _

_"Father! Please stop. I want to discuss what you're doing in this rebel group you've joined not my romantic life!" _

_"Well I'm not telling you anything until you tell me about this Talia of yours. She's pretty, and she looks nice. I just want to know if you are happy." Replied the stubborn old man. Chakotay kept his face the way it was as he laughed through the screen. His father was always adamant about hearing about Chakotays happiness since he joined Starfleet. As he laughed Chakotay let out a smile and eventually gave in._

_"Talia is, is someone that I would consider very close to. We are in a relationship, and I'm very, very happy with her." He said simply. His father grinned over the screen. "Now, about your project..."_

* * *

A long time ago Chakotay didn't understand what it meant to be part of a community, the kind his father had told him of, the one he was willing to die for. He thought his father was crazy for doing something like that. But after being in voyager for so long he understood the concept. It was his home now and he was proud of it. The crew was his family even if he didn't know everyone of them personally. Voyager was a place that he was proud of, when she looked good he felt accomplished; when the crew was well fed and happy he was happy.

Now seeing Voyager in such shape, and the crew in such distress he felt a bottomless pit of despair. He had worked so hard to make voyager the ship they it was, and because of his choice to drag the ship through the void the ship was half destroyed and the crew half dead. He had actually no idea how many people were dead and Alice, but as he ran through the corridors, over and past crewmembers he would look at them. Some wouldn't move, some would just be breathing, some had arms stretched out towards him begging for help. He could t stop though, he didn't know why, if he was willing to do anything g for his crew than why couldn't he stop for a moment and help a person to their feet?

He was running to catch up with B'Elanna who had been trying for the last twenty minutes to inch her way into engineering, but there were so many road blocks that it had taken so long. Chakotay had been crawling through Jeffreys tubes and running through halls, his lungs felt fine, but doing so much at once took a lot out of a person. But he couldn't stop, if engineering had been hit hard than there may not have been anyone except B'Elanna to fix the ship. No other engineers, just her.

He made it to the deck passing another hand full of crewmen in the halls. Around a dozen corners and down a thousand halls. He was hoping for the best but expecting the worst. No matter what they needed to contain the core just in case there was anything wrong with it and needed to get censors back online. Seven had said that there were a few Borg ships in a far area and a possible second storm. They would be dead for sure if one was close. They needed to see where everyone was and how many were alive which by the looks of things looked like two thirds of the crew alive. Looking at them suffer as he passed them made his heart heavy. He was willing to trade places with everyone of them to stop their pain. He was their first officer and it was his duty to keep them safe and he felt that he had failed. He had failed. Passing by them, trying to ignore them so he would reach engineering was hard for him, but they could all be dead if he didn't get there and help. Then he would have failed for sure. He was willing to give up his life for them if that was what it took and at that moment he was willing. It was better than watching his family suffer. He kept his head up and kept running.

They finally found a way in. They opened the only door that opened to the upper part of engineering where B'Elannas private work station was. He had to manually open the doors with the paddles. She helped by grabbing his left arm and pulling, her other arm was still aching from her shoulder. The doors finally budged allowing them access to the top of engineering. The only thing they could see was a white cloud of smoke smelling sweet as a gum tree from Risa. That was never a good sign, it usuAlly meant there was a plasma fire somewhere, the smoke smelled sweet unlike regular fires. They swayed the smoke away from their faces as it engulfed them they kept going forward until they could see where they were going. It finally cleared away from their faces and they could see the extent of the damage.

The warp core was in tact, there was no sign of a breach thank god. But consuls were flashing, broken and on fire. Some of those systems controlled some of the most important parts of the ships. There was a plasma fire at the main communication center and it was growing, heading towards the warp core. The environmental systems would have extinguished it but they were offline too. The only extinguishers they had in stock were for small fires, not this one, this one was big and increasingly dangerous.

"Chakotay! If the fire gets near the any of the warp systems we could have a melt down." B'Elanna said in a way she had never heard her use before. He understood her concern.

"A warp meltdown? That hasn't occurred on a starship in almost a century! How is that possible?"

"The fire has certain properties that can annotate the core, and with the amount of heat it can activate a melt down and there is nothing I would be able to do to stop it. Even if the ejection system was online, which it's not! It would only delay a mass explosion that would devastate the area! We need help getting the fire out."

Chakotay took the extinguisher from the side of one of the walls and from the the top section activated it. It hit the fire but only lasted 20 seconds only extinguishing the edge of the fire. Where was the rest of the engineering team he kept thinking. There were a few unconscious bodies and dead by the door, one was engulfed in flames. But that wasn't even half of the people that were on duty in engineering when the meteors hit.

"This one's gone." Chakotay yelled to B'Elanna who was working to get environmental controls online. "I'm going down there to see if those people are alive, and if there's another extinguisher." He used the ladder and carefully made his way down to the warp core. The systems that monitored the core was shaky but still online. Matter anti matter containment was normal but nearly enough to be abnormal which meant that heat inside the core was raising. The smoke was worse on the main level, Chakotay couldn't see his own hand nor the crewmen he was trying to save. The smoke down on the main level was worse smelling than the upper level. This smoke had the scent of burnt flesh, something Chakotay smelled often in the maquis. He didn't know who was burning, he saw nothing. He needed to find the other extinguisher but there was so much in his line of sight, he could have passed it long ago. He felt more tired and began to cough as smoke began filling in his lungs, he had just gotten his lungs back in working order too. The grey smoke grew as the green flame did. Chakotay waved his arms in front of his face struggling to see and breathe, he wasn't willing to die for nothing.

He just started feeling the walls for anything that felt like the extinguisher. He was no engineer, he had only a general direction as to where the thing would be. He knew he was in the right place but where? It barely mattered anymore. The damage he had caused the fire with the first attempt had already been for nothing. The fire had grown back to its original size. It became even harder to see, he started heading back to the ladder, he knew where that was. He needed to regain his perspective and quickly. He turned back hearing a noise behind him. The smoke grew more aggressive.

What was there making the smoke grow? Had it overtaken another crew member? He scurried up the ladder taken his first smoke free breath. The noise continued as the smoke filled the room. They covered their eyes from the stinging smoke

It stopped. B'Elanna and Chakotay opened their eyes, most of the smoke had dissipated. They stood from the railings looking down in awe. The fire was gone and replaced with an industrial extinguisher which was kept in a cargo bay. "Commander, lieutenant. I did not expect to see you here." The person said. Chakotay smiled, B'Elanna smiled even bigger.

"Vorik!" She yelled.


	9. Echoes

Vorik stared back at Chakotay and B'Elanna with his usual Vulcan face but they could tell he was happy to,see them. The two of them climbed down the ladder to the main level to greet vorik. B'Elanna did it with a hug, something she obviously didn't do consistently with every person. She was happy to see him, he was one of her best engineers and close friends which surprised her as much as it did him. Vorik had predicted after his previous approaches towards her affection that she would have absolutely no interest talking to him again. She hugged him with relief and gratitude. At first he didn't respond, just stood there like a little Vulcan statue that was so still that she wanted to punch,him but eventually with some hesitation he put his hands on her back.

"Where the hell did you come from?" She asked releasing him. He gathered himself, brushing his uniform straight. Chakotay laughed.

"Your engineering team and I took shelter in the Jeffrey tubes after the fire started. A lot are still near an access port. Two officers and myself went in search of an industrial extinguisher to bring back here. It seems I was the only one who was successful. May I ask what is going on commander?"

"Voyager is dead in the water Vorik. B'Elanna and I are trying to get main power back online. Or at least emergency transporters. B'Elanna said you were experimenting with those."

"Yes sir." He walked to a console and started manual overrides. "This will take a few minutes at least. I require you're assistance Ltd."

They began working but Chakotay feared that they were running out of time to save some of the crew members. If bulkheads could crush Tom Paris on the bridge what could be on other decks, what damage was there? He hadn't even seen deck five let alone astrometrics or the weapons bay. If they were going to save anyone, they needed to get the shields up two hours ago in his perspective. But no, he had to collapse from lack of oxygen. He was in perfect condition compared to a lot of others he had seen. One third dead? He couldn't comprehend it. So many good people are dead because of a choice they had made six months ago. Even if they would have died anyway he would have preferred it be from an alien attack or systems overload than some giant space rock.

"I think we got it." B'Elanna said. "Vorik, transport me to the bridge. I need to get Tom some help."

"Yes lieutenant."

"And Vorik. Good work today." She said just before she was beamed away. Chakotay pat him on the shoulder in gratitude.

B'Elanna was beamed to the bridge. Only Harry and Tom were left on the bridge. There were hatches open leading to tubes which were used by the rest of the bridge crew to get to the rest of the ship. "Tom." She said with no answer. She turned to Harry worried.

"Dont look at me. I got a hole in my leg and I'm not moving from this chair. He stopped talking a few minutes ago. But he's fine B'Elanna. I'm monitoring his vitals from here." Harry said sitting on his stool at his station. She snarled at him and bent down on her knees beside Tom.

"Tom." She said again shaking him. "Tom!" His body stood still. "Wake up Tom!" She raised her hand hitting him hard against his face. His entire body flinched awake. Tom's eyes were squinted and his face tired but he was very much alive. He stared at her but didn't speak; she checked his wounds on his stomach. Not only was there external bleeding but internal bleeding as well. She could see the tenderness under the skin and it could be very dangerous if not treated. She smiled at him, he just stared back at her in neither pain or fear. "You're gonna be fine Tom. I told Vorik to beam us to sickbay after a few minutes. Just a few minutes and we can treat you." Tom didn't respond but he understood what she said. He was concentrating on her but couldn't respond to what she was saying because he was concentrating on staying awake too. He had a feeling that if he fell asleep again he wouldn't wake up. It was just a though but it was a feeling too. He had never felt that way.

B'Elanna stayed on her knees next to Tom by his head talking to him. Giving him a reason to stay awake. It was only another minute before they saw that the transporter was activated. In a blink they were in sick bay with a dozen other people in the center of the room.

"Where's the doctor?" She asked looking around the room and seeing injured crewmen and no doctor.

"He went to the mess hall to treat people who can't get here. He'll be back within the hour hopefully." Said one of the Starfleet personnel. "What's wrong with him?"

Tom was one of the worse in sick bay. Most had burns and minor crush wounds, he was hit by an entire bulk head. In his condition he would die soon without professional treatment.

* * *

_Chakotay hadn't heard from his father in over a month, since their last communication. They had talked for an hour about his father's plans to invade cardassian space to take medical supplies and weapons inventory. His father never listened to what he had to say especially in these kinds of situations. His father was a stubborn old man who didn't see reason. If he moved he could avoid all conflicts with the cardassians and start a new life on a much nicer world. His world was dusty with only a river being the only nice thing to look at. Why be there when you could be on Risa or earth? He could make himself a new home and a new family with new neighbors. It wouldn't be the same but it was close and he wouldn't have to watch his family get slaughtered by a superior enemy. _

_The thought never occurred to Chakotay that his father could actually be killed. surly possible but he didn't think it would really happen. Chakotay was more focused on his work. It was three months till the end of the year and when he would finally be able to go back to being a real officer again. He felt so out of place there, being three years older than,everyone else on campus. Not many people looked down on him for it, a lot of cadets didn't know he was sent back which was good for him at the beginning of the year, a fresh start for meeting new people. Barely anyone remembered him from his previous years, besides the teachers of course and the occasional senior who had been a freshman the last time they had seen each other. But it was better than having every one know that he miserably failed. _

_Chakotay had been trying to fix his grades even though he didn't have his heart in it. He was doing much better, all he had to do was try a little and his grades perked up again; but he was trying for the wrong reasons, he had even less heart than before. His father had told him to work harder so he did, but the same person who was making him do better was making him feel worse. Though his father was an idiot for fighting the cardassians a part of him wanted to be by his father's side. To watch out for him. His father had even asked him to join him and his invitation echoed in Chakotays ears. A chance for excitement was better than staying classes waiting to see if he was good enough the second time. It was how he was raised to question and be free, but that wasn't what Starfleet was about. That was what he found out in his first assignment, there was no freedom, no choice, do what you are supposed to do and listen to the command officers. Never give your own opinion, never talk back, never asked for personal time. It was the opposite structure he was used to on his colony. And that fact was the reason his father's words were still in his head. "Join me son. Help make a difference." _

_He had no purpose at that point. He just worked to change himself and fix his grades to become the perfect officer. When he looked around the campus and back at himself he saw perfect officers in them. They had the perfect hair and uniform and perfect grades. He was rugged and jagged compared to them. He loved to stand out while all the others formed together to create the perfect unit. Too jagged. _

_He needed to talk to Talia, one of the most respectable and beautiful officers he had ever met. She was the best thing there for him. She was the person he could talk to without having to worry about misunderstanding. It was crazy but he was actually thinking of going with his father. He had to talk to her first though so she could give him a reason to stay or a reason to _

_He invited Talia over for the evening. Something they often did which meant she wouldn't see anything coming. He was shaking on the inside when she came in the room but he didn't let her see it. She came in with her uniform unzipped to her thighs wearing a tube top underneath. Her hair in a bun still but in a giant mess on top of her head. She greeted him with her big warm smile and a kiss on his cheek. "Talia I have a-" he stopped noticing a new pun on her shirt. "What's that?" He said returning her smile because he knew what it was. _

_"I was awarded the Salir pin." She said excitedly. With good reason. The pin symbolized excellence in the science field. Only two in every class was give out and allowed a cadet to get special training on a starship for a week. Talia would be put in charge of a starship science department for that time to train. It was what every science cadet worked for. "And I think we need to celebrate." Talia brushed the back of Chakotays neck. _

_"We definitely should." Chakotay responded bringing her closer to him and began kissing her._

* * *

Tom lay still as B'Elanna moved a regenerater back and forth over his leg burn but it wouldn't work on his internal bleeding. She had no experience with any wounds during a crisis. The second best person to the doctor that could treat Tom was Tom. And obviously that wasn't possible. She kept thinking just a few more minutes and the doctor would come in to treat him and save his life. There was no other option, if he didn't come in time she would destroy his program in the most savage way she could possibly find. First she would make him watch as she destroyed the mobile emitter, the thing that gave his joy and freedom then destroy him. But it could all be averted if he would just come through the damn doors! She was growing nervous, all of her wanted to hunt him down but all of her wanted to stay with Tom. Whether he was a dead corpse or not. There was a saying Chakotay had told her once that echoed through her every day since he said it because it was so true.

"No one deserves to die alone. No one."


	10. Sadness

**Don't own the characters! Or voyager! If you like this there is a full story of mine called Dark Journey. Please review thank you for reading.**

You can get addicted to a certain kind of feeling, be it adrenaline running through your veins which makes you feel alive, sex which which almost allows two people to become one, even sadness. Sadness is the most dangerous, because you can get addicted to a certain kind that grabs hold of you and then never lets go. That's the addiction that stays with you forever whether you've conquered it or not, there is always a part of you that still clings on to the feeling. When you conquer it you become yourself again, you are happy you are happy, but a part of you wants to be sad. No addiction can really be cured and even if you get close something pulls you back.

Tom could feel it. He could feel the chills going down his spine, or what was left that he could feel. The sensation he felt of his warm blood turning cold was too strange to explain. B'Elannas face was too sad to explain. The look made him think she thought he was going to die, which made him think he was going to die. Was he that close he didn't know. But the fact that he felt cold everywhere was not a good sign. He could barely hear everything going on in the sick bay. He knew that people were there but everything was low and blurred. He saw people all around him, but he could only focus on B'Elanna. He felt better but his condition was getting worse. Doctors called this sudden burst of energy the surge. He didn't think it was real.

The surge was one of those supernatural phenomenon that was unexplainable. It allowed a person to get a final few hours of strength before they died to say goodbye to loved ones and so on. It didn't last Very long and was different for each person who experienced it. Some were able to walk around clear headed with enough energy to run a mile, others just had enough to say a few words. Tom didn't believe in the phenomenon but he intended to use his sudden strength. "Am I going to be okay B'Elanna?"

She looked into the eyes of a man she had learned to love over the years. She ignored the fact that there was bubbling blood all over the floor, all over his uniform, and the agonizing screams from behind her. "Yes." She lied. She didn't think he was. "The doctor is coming soon and he will be able to fix you up no problems at all."

"And if I die... Will you scream over my body?" He joked.

"Yes. Yes I will." She smiled back to him.

"And if I live... Will you marry me?" He smiled eagerly.

"Yes. Yes I will." She smiled back to him. She only wished.

Tom licked his lips and tried to to look behind him without moving his head. He lost his smile and a sadness overcame him. "I, I don't think I'm going to be getting out of this." His lip slightly quivered, he had never given death a second thought. He always assumed he'd die quickly. B'Elanna and her Klingon exterior had nearly vanished by that time. She took him least bloody hand in her hand.

"Don't say that why would you say that?"

"Because I stopped feeling anything two minutes ago." He said quietly. "It's hard to come back from that when you're dancing on the edge of death."

"Well when you're done dancing ill see you on the barge of the dead."

"So I'm not going to stovocor?" He started laughing with her. "Well that sucks." He liked that even now she could make him feel better even if she did cause him a lot of physical pain now and again. He could never figure out why he was so drawn to her but in this moment he was pretty sure he had figured it out.

"The doctor can help you, if he's here soon he can fix you and you'll be fine. Just stop saying your dying or I swear ill kill you myself!" She said getting close to his face trying to keep her smile. Klingon didn't cry a lot, she didn't consider herself Klingon but she liked that tradition.

"I'm doing my best. But it's hard to focus, I'm so tiered. And the cars rolling by aren't helping." He started rambling about invisible objects from the 20th century. B'Elanna looked around and saw nothing. She reached for her tricorder and scanned Tom. He had a concussion obviously but he was starting to delude.

"Tom, you have to listen to me. You have to stay awake!" She talked loudly through her teeth in her serious Klingon voice. "Tom. Stay awake!"

"I can't help it. I'm so tiered."

"If you fall asleep you'll surely die. You can't die yet. You hear me? You are not allowed to die Ltd, not any time soon." She started yelling loud enough that everyone could hear her. She didn't care.

"B'Elanna." He squeezed her hand. "I can't feel my toes, I see blood coming out of me, I see my leg bone as we speak, I mean that is kinda bad isn't it. But I can't feel it. I don't think there's any coming back from something like that. And if I do and it turns out I still can't feel anything, than I don't want to be in it. That's not the kind of life I want. I don't want to see you watch me suffer and I don't want to suffer." He stopped talking to squeeze her hand. "How did I get so lucky to have you? You're the best thing that ever happened to me. I'm glad you were a part of my life."

"But You're going to fine." But Tom shook his head.

"I'm running low." He said talking about his energy. It seemed the surge wasn't too kind to him. Only twenty minutes of energy and he didn't even have half of what he had to say out. He was so tiered, he tried to keep his eyes open but he was losing focus.

"I don't know what I'm going to do without you. We still have two more years in this void. I'm gonna go crazy." She said trying to keep a straight face. But she was starting to accept the fact that she may lose Tom.

"You're gonna have to learn. You're stubborn.,but I love you anyway." He started losing his grip on reality and closed his eyes. Just listening to the sound of B'Elanna breathing and talking. He heard the rest of the things in the room, B'Elanna was just more pronounced. He could hear the scanner of a regenerator, the quiet weaping of a crew member, the sound of a tray being dropped, the doors opening, people turning over.

B'Elanna heard everything too. She turned around and the doctor was staring over her shoulder. He had been the one that had come through the door. He had a sad face when he started at Tom's condition. "You can help him right?"

"Ill do my best." He said but kept his face the way it was. He saw Tom's condition and knew that he was one of the worst in the room. He needed to treat him first even though there were two other crew member with a similar and bad condition. He chose Tom because he couldn't bare to have B'Elanna staring over Tom's shoulder as he slowly died.

Tom heard the doctors voice and opened his eyes, he smiled knowing that he at least had a chance now to make it through the tradgedy, and even if he didn't he'd die in his sleep. That was how he always wanted to die. B'Elanna looked down and kissed his forehead. "I love you too. Even if you are an emotional pain in the ass." He nodded and smiled up at her.

"Hope to see you on the other side. Whatever side that's on."

* * *

_Chakotay was lying in bed with Talias head resting on his bare chest. He had a thousand things on his mind but being in the bed with Talia made everything almost seem non existent. He couldn't hide what he had to say too much longer, he feared that if he couldn't say if now he would never be able to say it at all. He sat up and rubber his face, Talia sat up in the bed with him reading his facial expressions. _

_"What?" She asked suddenly realizing there was something uncomfortable Chakotay wanted to say. "What?" _

_"What?" He looked up._

_"There's something isn't there. What do you have to say?"_

_"Well, I've been talking to my father again, talking a lot. He is fighting with the cardassians over territory. And he asked me to go and join him." Talias face was blank. She didn't see it coming. "And I'm thinking I might do it." _

_Suddenly her face was very expressive. Not one he truly expected to see. "That's crazy! Chakotay you're doing well here, you are going to go straight to junior lieutenant. I got the pin. Everything a going well, why do you want it to change? You're an idiot! Fighting in that way is against federation law, how can you abandon it so easily." She threw the covers off of her and quickly changed into her uniform ranting. "You've gone all this way to just give up everything. This is the biggest piece of shit I've ever heard come out of your mouth. You're too smart to make such a stupid decision." As soon as she was dressed she walked out slamming the door behind her. _

_Chakotay,didn't expect her to be so angry. He stood in his pants mouth hanging wide open, he couldn't believe what he just heard. She made a lot of good points but it was only what he was sharing with her. He thought she would understand a little better but above all he knew she was right. He had worked hard to get this far again. If he joined his father he may never see Talia again, and he loved Talia. Too much to let her go. His father was doing dangerous things out there and he could lose his life fighting, he couldn't do that to Talia. He hadn't made his decision but if he did go she had to be okay with it. _

_Talia meanwhile had stormed out of his room in a hurry but as soon as she slammed the door behind her she couldn't move. She leaned her back against the door and allowed herself to slide down it onto the floor. She loved Chakotay more than anyone knew. He was all she had left in the world besides her father. But since her brother died he had been going downhill fast. She almost joined him when her brother died, but Chakotay made her strong again. Now she had the much coveted pin for excellence in the scientific field. No one ever expected to get that, if could set up her career, her whole life, and she wanted Chakotay in it. Not dead floating around the bad lands. _

_She stayed on the floor cupping her face in her hands but she didn't cry, she was too strong to cry. Chakotay could die if he went with his father, he could die here, but here he would die honorably and there was a less likely chance. She didn't want him to die._

* * *

B'Elanna had been sitting on the floor outside the sick bay doors for nearly an hour. She knew she should be working but there was no way to communicate Chakotay to beam her back. So she sat outside sinking her nails into the carpeted floor. She was angry, she didn't know why, a way to compensate for not crying? She needed more than just boredom to cry.

It felt like an eternity waiting outside the sick bay, waiting to know if Tom was still alive. She had told him that if he died she'd kill him. And it was a serious threat too, even if it was ridiculous. He better be alive, she kept thinking. Once repairs were complete she would need someone to fight with. Talk with. Love with. She would be right behind him if he didn't, she'd meet him on the barge of the dead after dying of boredom. She swore she would. She barely got through the last few months with him, she wouldn't last a week without him. He was her only true true friend... Besides Vorik. But logic in high doses made her want to kill things. She definitely never felt more Klingon in her life.

The doors opened. "B'Elanna." The doctor said coming out of the doors. "I've done everything..."

**to be continued**


	11. Fault

It felt like a thousand minutes but when the words finally escaped from the holograms mouth she could barely understand him. She watched his lips move and listened to the sounds he made but she couldn't comprehend what he said. She had been preparing. Knowing that any second the doctor would come out of the sick bay and tell her Tom was indeed dead. She had been preparing for the news that she would have to live the rest of her life without Tom and spend most likely the rest of her life alone. She couldn't handle any other man on the entire ship besides Vorik and Chakotay and she didn't want a relationship with either of them. Even if she had wanted one with Chakotay in the past he was in love with Kathryn, at least it seemed that way.

The words kept coming but her focus was in the open doors staring at a motionless Tom. She didn't need the doctor to tell her he was dead. He wasn't moving, naked on the table. There was enough said. The doctor was long winded and said too much, never getting to the point till the very end. He was grooming his ego, talking about the brilliant techniques he used to try to save Tom but wouldn't get to the point. She needed to hear it from him, needed to hear the words.

"He's dead." That was all she needed to hear and she could just get on with her miserable life. It wouldn't be real until he said it. And yet he kept talking about the procedure and how his body fought the treatment and how he had been fighting an infection. Just say it she kept thinking. She didn't care about what he did. She wanted to know about Tom. She wanted to hear the words come out of the cocky little holograms mouth so he could finally shut up.

Finally she tuned in at the right moment to listen to the doctor finally say the words she needed to hear. "I did everything I could B'Elanna. And after a very long surgery it seems that Tom, is going to be okay."

B'Elanna had been looking down throughout the whole speech but in this moment she looked up with a tear in her eye not being able to comprehend what she heard. She had spent the last hour trying to make herself okay with Tom's death, and now suddenly he was going to be okay. Part of her wanted to scream in anger at the doctor, for making her wait so long to hear it; and parts of her wanted to hug him. She didn't want to do either too much, she just wanted to see Tom. The best she could do was nod at the doctor with the saddest little smile then run in to see Tom.

He looked beat up but he was in one big piece once again. He had a blanket covering the bottom part of his body and burns going all the way up. She couldn't see any incisions because the doctor had already repaired them but she did see how tender his entire body was. She still couldn't help but smile at him. She thought he was going to die the entire day, he did too though they had tried to not show it. Now she didn't have to learn what it was like to be lonely again, she had nearly forgotten since she and Tom had gotten together. He made her feel like she wasn't an outcAst in her own home.

She took his hand and he jerked. She let out a small laugh. "Tom. You're okay."

"I am? Didn't realize." He laughed a little but it hurt to move. "Sucks for you, you said you'd marry me."

B'Elanna widened her eyes. She had forgotten she had promised him that but only because she thought he was dying. She didn't completely resent the idea but the way he had asked was so strange at the strangest time but he must have been serious. "Fine" she said sourly. Tom grew a great smile and squeezed her hand. He was happy he was alive too.

* * *

Without B'Elanna repairs in engineering were four times slower. Vorik was her best engineer but he was nothing compared to her, but he was a hard worker. No one on the ship disliked Vorik, he was the most human vulcan anyone had ever met. That made him unique and people couldn't stay away from him. He on the other hand could only tolerate certain people and was true friends with only a hand full of crewmen. Chakotay wasn't one of those people but Vorik was fascinated with the commander. He saw him in a different sense than he saw anyone else. The commander was very private and yet you could read him like a book if something was bothering him. Or if he was happy or in love. He showed exactly what he was feeling whether he wanted to or not.

In this case something was definitely on his mind. As he worked he mumbled to himself or drop a tool from lack of concentration. Even if something was bothering him, Chakotay never let it interfere with his work. Vorik was fascinated in his behavior but didn't want to ask him up front what it was about. He found that when he did that it made the person he was questioning feel nervous.

"Do you think that lieutenant Paris will be alright commander?" Vorik asked.

"I don't know. I'm not a betting man so I couldn't tell you." He answered not turning his head, a tool between his teeth.

"I contemplate what it would be like for B'Elanna if he does not survive."

"Yeah, it's incredibly hard when someone you love that much dies right in front of you, and you can't do anything about it. You can't even imagine."

"Do you have that particular experience commander?" Vorik asked intrigued.

"Well, she wasn't right in front of me. But I was just as helpless when it came to her death." He said this time refusing to look up.

"She sir?" He raised his brow.

"Her name was Talia. She um. She died while in the academy. I blame myself."

"Was it your fault?"

"It depends on how you look at it." There were a lot of ways to look at it but Chakotay truly did blame himself for her death. And after she died he was never the same. "And I look at it in an independent way than anyone else."

"From where I stand sir, not knowing what you did, the only logical ways where it can be interpreted as your fault would be if you murdered her or accidental man slaughter. Those are the only logical ways. Did you do one of those two sir?"

"No." He answered the logic in a bitter way. Tuvok had enough to fill the ship, he didn't need anymore in his daily routine.

They continued their repairs on engineering but the more they got running the worse it looked. Deck twelve was gone. Life support was offline on the entire deck, and there was exposed space in several sections. Internal sensors detected only twelve life signs but it was obviously malfunctioning. They had seen over fifty living crew members throughout the ship up and walking. But it was only the beginning. Power was low and draining, they would be in danger of losing all if the power array wasn't restarted in the next ten hours. It was the hardest repair to do on the ship, and so massive that Janeway often had to land the ship on a planet to get work done. If not beanbag would need her whole engineering team to do it.

"Do you know where the rest of the the engineering crew is?" Chakotay turned to Vorik. He nodded. "Get them." He ordered. Vorik did as he was told and climbed inside the Jeffreys tube.

Once again Chakotay found himself alone. During an emergency it was the worst thing to be and this was the worst emergency voyager had probably ever faced. He still didn't know what to do about it. He felt so guilty about what had happened and anyone who saw him knew it, the look was plastered onto his face. There was nothing more he could do in engineering, vorik was getting everything under control. He was one of the best engineers he had. He had to remember to promote the guy when it was all over, he deserved it. But there wasn't anything for Chakotay, his best option was to find the rest of the bridge crew. And Kathryn. He needed to find Kathryn. It had been a long day and when he thought that it was no time for a relationship he didn't realize how bad he needed one. In these times as he had seen, people can die at any second, and not living every moment to the fullest wasn't an option. He needed to find her, make things right, and help his crew.

* * *

_Chakotay felt like he had lost himself. Talia was leaving for the USS Adonis in two days and they hadn't spoken in a week, since their explosion, her explosion to be more accurate. When he saw her walking around campus she did everything she could to avoid the hell out of him and give him the most uncomfortable face ever. He didn't blame her for being angry but he was angry at her behavior. Trills did have one hell of a temper but he had never seen her use it. She was as hot headed as a Klingon in the cold. If she would just calm down enough to have a conversation with him he could explain himself to her, he didn't even want to go with his father anymore. But he wanted to make the point of why he had wanted to go, it was his father and he didn't want him to die as much as he would want himself to. And it was true what she said, if he died out there it would be his own fault. It wouldn't be his fault if his father died but he felt like it was. _

_Chakotay sat at the end of the bar with bolion whiskey in his hand. He had sent out an olive branch to Talia to join him but he doubted she would accept. With every drink he became more angry with her. Why didnt she listen to him a little bit? She had just smashed the concept without a second thought and then bolted out of the room. It was offensive and just irritating. He stayed silent and kept his face straight not letting any emotion show on his face but whenever he did that his face radiated anger. He signaled to the bar tender for another drink. The guy nodded and then pointed to the entrance. Chakotay wasn't that drunk, he wasn't going to leave! He was just about to speak his mind when he looked into the direction of the where the guy had pointed and saw Talia walking into the bar. Chakotay set down his empty cup and stood from his stool in shock. He didn't think she would show but she was looking in his exact direction with a straight nearly sad face. She was wearing a civilian silver blue jump suit and had put her dirty blonde hair in a side braid which rested on her shoulder. She walked up to Chakotay then sat on the stool next to him. Not saying a word she held his tan face in her hand and kissed his forehead. Chakotay didn't understand what this meant. He wasn't mad anymore all of a sudden. No matter what he did he couldn't stay mad at her when it came down to it. He was now mad at himself for giving up so quickly ironically. _

_"Is that an apology?" He asked her nervously not knowing exact what to say._

_"No. But it's the best you're going to get. Because I'm leaving in a few days and I need to know you are going to be safe here. Here. Being in the academy." _

_"And I will be. Ill be waiting for you right here. At the bar." He joked pointing to the stool. "And you be safe and stay on your side of the border." _

_"I will. I'm not letting the cardassians get anywhere near me." She said looking into his eyes. She didn't let him see the deep concern in her eyes. She wasn't completely convinced he was going to stay and she was still a bit mad, but she had to give him the benefit of the doubt. He was the greatest love she had ever had. She wasn't going to let sheer stupidity get in the way of it._


End file.
